21st June - Baby on board

Been taking a blog break. The purpose is to stir up some reader tension..... or..... my fingers fell off for a bit.

We have a new addition to the family. I visited my new born Niece only to be promoted from uncle to God Father! Some of you heathens may be scratching your cynical godless heads on why this is important. The reasons are threefold:

1) The child will recieve preferential treatment over all other children. This is particularly humourous when visiting the God child with his/her siblings present. You can get them huge super presents that only work with 3 of those really big batteries and then get their siblings a Mars bar and not feel bad.

2) You get to do first dance at their wedding.... This isnt the case if the child is a boy.

3) You have the honour introducing the child to Jebus and his 6 wives and get to inform the child on the religious importance of not pulling faces while the wind is blowing.

My brother told me about my promotion as I held my niece for the first time. When he broke the news, the child did a little baby sick on my hand! I made a mental note to forget her 18th birthday present. That'll learn her.

In other news there has been some surprise results in the football. The Turks are triumphantly marching through to the semis with the Russians not far behind. It's starting to look like the Eurovision all over again.

Tomorrow we are celebrating my mums birthday. My brothers and me have conspired to give her the ol' tunnel of death. Let see if her varicose veins take the beating as good as they did last year.